2/29

I officially passed my medical clearance, woohoo! I’m pretty much the healthiest I’ve ever been. Blood pressure, glucose, cholesterol, white and red blood cell counts, etc, are all good. No skin cancer, no STDs, no anything! I definitely still need to shed another 20lbs or so, but my efforts to be healthy are winning. So, one hurdle down. The security forms were all filed too, only apparently my handwriting was illegible so I need to resubmit them. But, I’m several steps closer to the end of this process.

Of course, now that I’ve moved this far along in the process, the agency I interned with last summer is looking to hire and now that might be a possibility. The job is a little more boring and less intense, but it would likely pay the same, would result in competitive hiring status, and wouldn’t have risk of death. So, you know, there are benefits. I’m kind of just letting things be what they’ll be at this point. Similarly, it still isn’t over in waiting on an internship to work out, and if that does fail, I’ve got a backup plan now. My school needs help with admissions and grants, so at least I can have something to fill my time in a “worst-case” situation.

I went to a violet wands class yesterday, which was pretty cool. I still have marks on my arm from it, and it really didn’t hurt that much. Apparently my tendency to get sunburn will be an issue in playing with this toy. It’s especially nifty how you can use the body contact probe so that one person’s touch is electrified. As sensitive as I am without electricity, I can only imagine the possibilities with it. If only it didn’t cost $500-$900 for a set…

In other randoms:

  • I really dislike most of what is considered trendy fashion. Prints and bright colors are in, and other than plaid and some geometric stuff, I hate prints. Some occasional florals work, but in general, it is just too much in my mind. I like it classic, simple.
  • I’m officially a card-carrying member of kink, in that I actually joined BR. I just think it’s amusing that it’s so official now.
  • With some re-evaluation, I think more of what I like about both rope and pain is it’s ability to center and focus me. I tend to get scattered and distracted easily, call it high-strung or ADHD, but concentrating on the moment isn’t the easiest thing for me. When tied up, you really have no other option. It’s everything that appeals to me about road trips, only much more sensually loaded. (With road trips, I love that you can’t feel guilty about reading, talking, listening to music, etc. because you couldn’t be doing anything else – you can’t feel guilty about relaxing when tied up, because you have no other option.) Pain has a similar end result, only gets there because it just forces you to think about it and only it.
  • My roommates have been absent or asleep to the extent that I almost feel like I’m living alone. It’s kind of awesome, if only the demon cat was less of a demon.
  • I forgot how nice it was to be able to read, stay current on what’s going on in the world, meet up with friends, etc. without feeling underlying anxiety from too much to do. I mean, right now I still have the anxiety from our capstone project, a midterm, and a paper, but without work I can actually get a grasp on when I’ll get things done. I can’t wait until graduation, when I can have a life, have hobbies, and actually be a good long-distance friend.
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