25 Things About My Sexuality, Revisited

Site based on: http://25thingsaboutmysexuality.blogspot.com/. I have the original one bookmarked places, but it is no longer entirely relevant. As such, here’s the one year update.

  1. I am a masochist. I can orgasm from pain alone, especially a spanking or pain to the nipples. I also find emotional release cathartically through pain.
  2. I enjoy inflicting pain on others so long as I am assured that they enjoy it. In fact, doing so can cause me some sadistic glee. That said, I’m still very new to this and it makes me nervous; I’m treading carefully down this path.
  3. I love rope – being tied in it, tying others in it. It can be sexual, sensual, calming, or fun.
  4. I’m submissive. I enjoy being able to defer to my romantic partner and trust him to take control. I enjoy serving him, focusing on his pleasure, and obeying him. I do not submit easily or frequently, but when I do I enjoy it quite a bit.
  5. I’m monogamish. I’m open to my partners playing with others, so long as it’s in public or I’m present, or in certain other discussed situations; there must be mutual consent and communication about everything.
  6. I adore teasing and denial and orgasm control. This is something I don’t play with casually, especially since it’s all power exchange and sex oriented, but it’s a huge fetish of mine. That said, I’m not interested in a permanent chastity/denial situation or even one that spans more than a couple of weeks. Being challenged and tormented is good, tortured and entirely deprived, not so much.
  7. The more public the scene, the more it takes for me to be vocal. I will shout, shriek, scream, or squeak if surprised or in great pain. I will make more noise the more I trust my partner and the more comfortable I am with my surroundings.
  8. In pleasure or in pain, my body clearly physically responds. I contort into bizarre positions, squeeze things, struggle, flail, bite, dig nails in, etc. Sometimes this results in unpredictable cramping if in certain forms of bondage or unintentionally kicking folks in the head, but for the most part it is more entertaining than an issue.
  9. When I’m enjoying myself, my body shakes and shivers. If you hit a sweet spot, that’s what happens. Teasing or biting my neck is the fastest way to get this reaction.
  10. I suffer from vaginismus. Benefit of this – I’m pretty incredibly tight and my orgasms are super intense. Main associated things: one night stands are out, foreplay is a must, and bigger is not always better.
  11. Ironically, given the previous issues with penetration, I actually climax hardest (and sometimes can’t climax without) with penetration. My g-spot is very easily accessible, and I have amazingly strong orgasms with penetration.
  12. I find the whole concept of “scenes” at parties and events a tad disconcerting. I’m more inclined to play with friends and romantic partners only. I want one or both partners to get off or at the very least experience obviously strong sexual reactions. If that isn’t happening, then there needs to be an educational component or a humorous one (having fun casually, so long as both people are having fun casually and not getting off on it is fine too).
  13. I don’t do well with performance pressure. I like to know expectations and exceed them. If my orgasm is the primary goal of a scene, the pressure to climax mentally blocks it from happening. If my partner wants me to scream, I get stubborn and over-aware of my vocal reactions and it’s less likely to happen.
  14. I like to try everything at least once, if not twice. There are some things I rule out now that I will likely try one day, and there are others that may never be tried if I don’t get over certain fears or squicks. Mostly, though, my curiosity leads me to want to see what things are like for myself before judging them.
  15. I write erotic fiction that I publish on literotica. It’s all fiction, usually fantasies I’ve had rolling around in my head that I wrote down on paper after meeting someone I could imagine in the role of the protagonist.
  16. I had a traumatic issue with a female at an early age. As a result, I’m very hesitant to explore sexual encounters with women. I occasionally am comfortable enough and like someone enough to experiment. I am not – at this point, at least – at all ok with delving below the waist on another female, and I tend to get uncomfortable with overt agressive sexual advances from women.
  17. I read a lot of erotic fiction and fantasize quite a bit, but I don’t watch porn. I’ve watched maybe 2-3 short clips ever, and one movie (pirates). I wouldn’t be opposed to watching some with a partner, maybe even acting it out, but I don’t have any desire to seek it out on my own.
  18. I am easily embarrassed and flustered, especially when it comes to talking dirty or about sexual things. I get very turned on when a man gets explicit with me, and I get hot being forced to vocalize, even if it’s nearly impossible for me to get words out. That said, I don’t like being called a cunt or whore – degradation doesn’t do it for me.
  19. I’m someone who follows the rules, is a minor neat-freak, and enjoys planning and logistics. Read into that what you will.
  20. I strongly dislike when people vocally insert themselves into my scenes/play. If you aren’t invited in ahead of time, don’t join in. The only exception is in specific party situations where everyone is sort of involved in everyone’s play intentionally, or if the insertion was by a more primary partner of mine who had implicit permission to interrupt.
  21. I have a bit of an oral fixation. I really enjoy giving head, and I get off on my partner getting off on that. I get turned on sucking on my partner’s dick. I can deep throat a decent amount, but I do have an active gag reflex. I do get a bit nervous the first time with a new partner, and I like/welcome tips and instructions from my partner. I also get very nervous about STDs, so the testing discussion or condoms need to be used first. Don’t think this interest means I give head to everyone, just that I do really enjoy it with my sexual partners.
  22. I prefer yellow-red safeword combinations, as I’m more of a yellow than red person. I need middle ground options.
  23. It takes hanging out with me several times, maybe around 5, before you can really start to capture my personality. It takes me equally as long to get a feel for someone else, too. That’s how long it takes to cement an initial feeling, lose or gain my trust (at least in basic things), determine attraction, and see if we enjoy one another’s company.
  24. I’m a midwestern girl, raised Catholic, with Mormon and born-again best friends at different points in my life. I am not an atheist, and I do believe in God. I have a high ethical and moral code. I’m relatively modest and a bit of a prude. Sex is never meaningless for me. With a friend or romantic interest, it means something to me and must mean something to my partner for it to work.
  25. I’m still learning proper ways to communicate, especially about my sexuality. As a result, I tend towards bluntness and over-sharing, because too much honesty is better than too little. I’m a tad awkward. You’ve been forewarned. Feel free to ask direct questions, I’ll always answer honestly and I prefer that type of communicative initiative. I am horrible at playing the typical games associated with dating. I’m working on it.

Link to the original list.

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One response to “25 Things About My Sexuality, Revisited

  1. Pingback: 25 Things About my Sexuality « Inquisitive Explorer

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