Lately, I think I’ve broken my funk of the last several months. There’s still some stress, but I’ve generally been getting things in order and living life, and who could ask for more? Some things that have helped me a lot are trying to stick to my new year’s resolutions/tracking lists, and using an “awesomeness” journal. I read a lot about people writing every day about things they are grateful for, or one sentence about something happy, etc., and so I’ve been utilizing the private features of WordPress and doing something similar. Each week, I’ve written some bullets of the things that happened during the week that I consider awesome. Over 4 entries, I’ve had over 30 awesome things, and it really makes me appreciate the life I’m able to live. I highly recommend this exercise.
Random accomplishment revelry: I FINALLY registered my car!! It only took 7 trips to the DMV…but it’s done! I’m officially a VA resident now in every way.
I’ve been a lot happier at work lately. Where we are in our report means is very tedious – we have to source every single number and statement so that a cold reader could come to the same conclusion (for every bit of our 17pg report. It’s a bit frustrating, because, as per usual, since I did most of the groundwork analysis and writing, my coworker/supervisor can only do so much of this. That said, it’s not hard to do, just time –consuming and tedious, and it leaves me feeling accomplished because I get to walk through what I’ve done. Hopefully my hard work will pay off. In the meantime, we have a lot of new staff and some leadership changes, which keeps it interesting. I also started doing yoga at lunch with two women I work with, and it has done amazing things for my mood. Yoga is surprisingly more challenging than expected. I can do the poses, but holding and connecting them isn’t simple. I love the soreness of using different muscles, I like the break in my day at work, and I like socializing with some of my cooler coworkers (it makes it a much better environment). Only took 8 months to find people I can hang with here…
I really overcommitted with restaurant week this year. February in general, really, is just too busy and expensive. Rather than flake out of things, I’m trying to live in the moment, budget where I can, be healthy how I can, and wait it out. Then, in March and April, I’m going to make a much stronger effort to do a little less.
I was especially thinking about that this past weekend. I drove up to Pittsburgh to visit some old friends, and first off – there’s nothing like listening to music and beautiful countryside to calm me down, seriously. Rural PA is amazingly beautiful. On the drive, I kept thinking how it would be to live in the country. In some ways, I really feel I could be genuinely satisfied and happy raising a family in the middle of nowhere, maybe writing and focusing on community activism or working in a low-powered job somewhere. I could focus on more creative interests and relax. There’d be few worries. A friend on Fetlife posted about being a homebody/nester, and I guess being from the Midwest, that resonates with me. I enjoy small groups, simple activities and get togethers, and time at home. Too much of that makes me antsy, but I like about equal parts into/extroverted activities. In DC, I feel like being a homebody is seen as a negative thing, something to be ashamed of. This bothers me – why is it wrong to take time to yourself, to focus on those closest to you and not your outer circles, etc?
My friends in Pittsburgh (and Indiana, Ohio, Illinois, etc.) all live quieter lives. During the week, they focus on cooking, working out, reading or other hobbies, and then their weekends are full of social things. DC feels fundamentally different to me. There’s so much more of an emphasis on social connections here, and there’s generally more going on as it’s a much bigger city. I am envious of the routine of my friends’ lives. I want to figure out ways to create that lifestyle for myself here. I think I need to commit to regularly scheduled things somehow. I am my own worst enemy with this – I want to see everyone and do everything, and I’m not great at saying no to things I want to do, even if I sometimes should. Improving on that is pretty much what a majority of my NYE goals focused on.
Interesting life advice from random article online: Live with regrets. If you don’t have regrets, you’re not pushing yourself to try new things or take risks.