I found a list of 20 questions to ask on a date years ago, and saved it as a conversation starter. I have that and the 34 questions that inspire love (look it up in conjunction with the new york times). As a get-back-to-blogging exercise, I am going to answer all of these on the blog over time.
- What was your funnest subject in high school & which one did you dread?
It depended a bit on the year, because I had different required classes and electives each year. I dreaded geometry and trigonometry/precalculus. I was never terrible at math, but it required a lot more work for me to get a decent grade. Math never came naturally to me. I loved show choir, when I was in it, and french class was always fun. At various times, I also really loved ceramics, us government, and my block AP US history/honors english class, mostly because of the teachers.
- What is one attribute of your mother that you see in yourself?
My mom was super easily amused and had a wacko sense of humor (with a tinge of perversity), and she used that to entertain others and keep others’ spirits up. I have a very similar sense of humor/entertainment, and I use it in much the same way she did. I’m a little more withdrawn/shy than she was, but the elements are all definitely there.
- How did your mother and father meet?
My mom lived with her mom while she was recovering from a surgery. My dad was my grandmother’s neighbor in the condo building, and he used to help care for my grandmother (take in her mail, etc.). They met that way, and bumped into each other over laundry in the building’s common areas enough times that my dad was able to get the nerve to ask her out. They were 30/31 when they met.
- Who would you like to have a closer relationship with?
My aunt and uncle in the midwest (my mom’s youngest brother). These relatives have a daughter that lives with her husband and newborn in DC, and we’ve hung out a few times more recently too. I never really saw these relatives growing up because of distance, but they’re all intelligent and kind people with good senses of humor. They also value family and show up for one another. When my mom passed, this aunt really went out of her way to show me love and support. I think we both want to build a better relationship, but it’s a bit awkward for me since it’s still so new. I’m going out of my way to visit them this May so we can try to foster the relationship, and she’s offered to plan a shower for my wedding which shows her interest too. Hopefully, we can build something. I get really sad and anxious when I think about having a baby and doing major life things without my mom. My future MIL is nice, but she has lots of kids and isn’t the most supportive…she doesn’t really put a lot of effort in reaching out, and she reacts oddly when I do, so we haven’t built much there yet. This aunt would be there for me in a second if I asked, and I want to establish something where I’d be OK calling on her, and I can be there for her and their family too. We’ll see how it goes…
- What do you think happens to you when you die?
This is a hard one. I think something happens. I don’t think we just go into the ground/dust forever. I don’t know what the exact next steps are, but I think there’s some sort of afterlife place or experience, where we reunite with loved ones, and we reincarnate or in some way are able to support people on earth. I’m pretty agnostic at this point, wherein I think there’s something, but I don’t know what, and I don’t spend a lot of time on trying to figure out what’s next.