Borrowing the title phrase from a friend.
I MUST. STOP. Procrastinating.
Clearly I’m failing at that already, given this posting.
For serious though, the more I have to do, the worse it gets. Don’t worry, everything gets done, it’s just that it could be being done so much more efficiently. This bothers me…but not enough to change my work habits.
The countdown is almost finished, though. I have two classes tomorrow, and then it’s just a series of exams/papers. To be exact: 1 hw assignment, 3 group papers, and 4 exams and I’m done! I’m most worried about my financial analysis and management science exams. I can do very poorly on finanal and still get an A-, but since I’ve missed a whole bunch of classes, I’m concerned. Man Sci will just be super hard, because it always is, but it is also awesome so that’s ok.
Dream apprenticeship job for next year has decided to look at resumes. I have a meeting set for when I get to DC, and fingers crossed they will be willing to hire someone and that someone will be me! There is one other person in my program who wants the position too, which sucks, but if I can get there in person I think my passion will pull me through.
I got some more $$ for the summer. I’m officially able to cover metro, rent, and moving, and will just be left with food and fun to charge to credit cards. This is acceptable. Not a dream situation, but hopefully worth it. Now if only my security clearance forms would come… The pissiest part of this is that if I have to start my work later, I could have stayed in Pittsburgh longer or gone home for a bit. Uncertainty stinks.
Kinky munch yesterday went pretty well, if rather socially exhaustive. Trying to catch up with people, avoid awkwardness, and remain entertaining can take its toll in a group of 50ish people. I did alright, but I still haven’t managed to be able to eat at one of those things. I get too nervous and lose my appetite. I think this is why I much prefer game nights – you’re guaranteed something to do, something to talk about, and an easy way to initiate laughter. Despite that, I did enjoy myself and it was nice to escape grad school world.
Basically, I really, really need to release stress. I think that is part of why I’m procrastinating so much. The stress level amongst the peers in my program is through the roof. If I were in a vacuum, I’d be fine. Unfortunately, I tend to really feel it when people I know aren’t doing well, and so when everyone freaks out it freaks me out. Combined with the number of group projects, and these lingering deadlines that kind of leave you feeling scattered, it doesn’t make for a good mindset. So, by the time the day is done and I’m home, all I want to do is read or watch tv or whatever. Or hurt someone, but I tend not to go that way.
So, stress release. Best ways to do this: serious masochistic release or helplessness time. Best available option: accomplish something, clean, then reassess. Probably go to bed, and sleep / take care of business.
On a totally random note, I just googled euphemisms for masturbating (you know you’re procrastinating when…), and found this site, which is utterly ridiculous:
Some snippets: bop the bologna, making the beaver swim, hand to gland combat, acting out grapes of wrath…and many more. The sheer crudeness of these is hilariously disgusting.